Billionaire Bars

Billionaire Bars | Sarcastic Cooking

Yessss!!! Finally. Here it is. The long awaited sweet treat I have been promising since Saturday. I normally ship the treats I bake off with Mike to share at school with his fellow teachers. Since Mike is on spring break, this week these babies stay here with me!

That is right. Sixteen beautiful bars of chocolate ganache, caramel, and hazelnut shortbread layers calling my name every single day from the kitchen.

I don’t need to eat these. The five, give or take, pounds of leftover baby weight on my belly is a good reminder that I do not need these bars. [Read more…]

Kit Kat Caramel Blondies

Kit Kat Caramel Blondies | Sarcastic Cooking

So, maybe this recipe would have been more appropriate around Halloween. But, since I normally boycott all things related to Halloween, this amazing recipe got pushed to the side and I kinda forgot about it. Sorry, my beautiful blonde friend.

This past Halloween, I was super pumped to hand the candy out to the kids since I was pregnant and all. I kept imagining taking my own little guy trick or treating one day. I pray that he never chooses a scary bloody costume; I am not a fan of those kids. [Read more…]

Caramel Apple Oatmeal Rice Krispy Treats

Can I confess something to you all? Too bad, I’m going to anyway. When I was younger, I never really liked Rice Krispies treats. I don’t even remember my mom making them quite often, honestly. And, I am pretty sure my brothers didn’t really like them either.

Maybe it had something to do with how sticky your fingers would get while you held the Rice Krispies treat. I don’t know. Or maybe it had something to do with the fact that sweet and cereal were two things that did not go together in our house. [Read more…]

Homemade Girl Scout Cookies

Back when Stephie and I had a chance to cook and bake together over the holidays, we knew we had to make these. Or, more like I insisted we had to make these, because Stephie is a weirdo that doesn’t like chocolate. However, she did say her Dad would really like these.

We were like a little Lucy and Ethel cookie making assembly line of two.

I think that I am going to bake some more of these up for Valentine’s Day. I think there is no better way to show your appreciation for your significant other or even a friend or family member than with cookies.

It is a great way to say thank you for not always stealing the covers, thank you for not minding my cold ass feet and hands making contact with your bare skin in the middle of winter, thank you for always pouring a glass of wine for me when you pour one for yourself, and thank you for loving me even when I choose not to shower for a day. Clearly those are just, you know, general examples…

Homemade Girl Scout Cookies
 
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Make your favorite Girl Scout cookies at home.
Author:
Recipe type: Dessert
Serves: Makes About 48

Ingredients
  • Shortbread Cookies:
  • ¾ Cup (1½ Sticks) Unsalted Butter, softened
  • ½ Cup Plus 2 Tablespoons Granulated Sugar
  • 1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract
  • 1¾ Cup All -Purpose Flour
  • Pinch Salt
  • Coconut-Caramel Topping:
  • 1 Cup Light Brown Sugar, packed
  • ½ Cup Heavy Cream
  • ¼ Cup (1/2 stick) Unsalted Butter, softened
  • ¼ Teaspoon Salt
  • 2 ½-3 Cups Shredded Coconut
  • 8 Ounces Semisweet Chocolate, melted

Instructions
  1. In the bowl of an electric stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream together the butter and sugar for about three minutes until light and fluffy.
  2. Add vanilla, mix, and then scrape down the sides.
  3. In a mixing bowl, whisk together the flour and salt. With the mixer on low, slowly add the flour mixture into the bowl. Mix until dough comes together. Place the dough on a piece of plastic wrap. Press the dough together and form into a flat disc. Wrap and place in the refrigerator for at least thirty minutes.
  4. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
  5. Lightly flour a work surface, remove dough from wrap, and then roll out the dough until it is ⅛ inch thick.
  6. Cut out 2 – 2 ½ inch circles in the dough and make a smaller circle in the center, like a little flat doughnut. Add the shapes to a parchment lined baking sheet and chill in the refrigerator for another fifteen minutes while the oven heats up.
  7. Bake cookies for 18 to 20 minutes until the edges barely brown. Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool completely. Continue to bake cookies in batches until all are baked.
  8. To make the coconut caramel topping, add the sugar, cream, butter, and salt to a small saucepan. Heat over medium heat while stirring for about six to seven minutes until sauce cooks down and forms a smooth caramel sauce. Fold in coconut until fully incorporated. Remove from heat.
  9. Melt half of the chocolate chips in the microwave. Dip the bottoms of the cookies into the chocolate and then add to a parchment lined baking sheet. Allow chocolate to set up and harden for fifteen minutes.
  10. After the chocolate on the bottom is hard, add a spoonful of the caramel coconut sauce to the top. Spread out in a thin layer on top of each cookie. Place cookies back on parchment for about fifteen minutes.
  11. Lastly melt the rest of the chocolate chips. Add the melted chocolate to a small plastic sandwich bag. Carefully snip off the corner of the bag. Use the bag to drizzle the chocolate over the tops of the cookies. Let sit up for thirty minutes.
  12. Store cookies in an airtight container for up to five days.

Plus being able to make your own Girl Scout cookies makes you able to have them any time of year and not be forced to stockpile and freeze them so they last the entire year.

Recipe from Spoon, Fork, Bacon

Salted Caramel & Apple Crostata

Today has the feeling of a Monday. I love a good long weekend like the next person. My weekend was filled with TV, couch lounging, organizing, testing out some fall inspired recipes, and making sure Mike crosses a lot of stuff off of my to-do list for him.

Overall, it was a fun and productive weekend filled with a lot of caloric intake.

The only hiccup was last night felt like a Sunday. I definitely had a case of the Sunday night blues. Except it wasn’t Sunday. Excuse me while I get my bearings together over another giant, warm slice of this salted caramel and apple crostada.

Salted Caramel & Apple Crostata
 
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Author:
Serves: 6 – 8 people

Ingredients
  • For the Crust:
  • 2 ½ Cups All Purpose Flour
  • 1 Teaspoon Salt
  • 1 Teaspoon Sugar
  • 1 Cup Cold Unsalted Butter
  • 1 Egg, beaten
  • ¼ – ½ Cup Cold Water
  • For the Salted Caramel:
  • ½ cup granulated sugar
  • 2 tablespoons water
  • 2 tablespoons light corn syrup
  • ⅓ cup heavy cream
  • 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
  • ½ teaspoon sea salt
  • For the Apple Filling:
  • 1 Tablespoon Sugar
  • Pinch of Cinnamon
  • 2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice
  • 3 Granny Smith Apples, peeled and thinly sliced
  • ¼ Cup Chopped Peanuts (optional)

Instructions
  1. Start by making the dough. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, salt, and sugar.
  2. Cut the cold butter into cubes. In a food processor or using a pastry blender, combine the butter with the dough until the butter is about the size of an oat.
  3. Add the water, ¼ of a cup at a time, until it starts to hold. Work the dough together with your hands or with the use of the food processor.
  4. Turn the dough out onto a piece of plastic wrap. Form the dough into a flat disc, wrap tightly in plastic wrap, and then refrigerate for at least an hour.
  5. While the dough chills, make the caramel. To make the caramel, add sugar, water, and corn syrup to a medium saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium heat, stirring once or twice. Bring to a boil and allow to brown.
  6. Once sugar has browned to a medium amber color, remove from heat and immediately add heavy cream and butter. Mixture will boil and foam. Stir well.
  7. Add salt and stir well to incorporate. Place in a bowl off to the side to cool.
  8. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.
  9. In a medium bowl, combine the sliced apples, lemon juice, sugar, and cinnamon. Toss a few times to evenly coat all apple slices.
  10. At this time the dough should be ready to be rolled out. Remove the dough from the refrigerator and from the plastic wrap. Roll dough out to a ⅛” thick, 16” circle on a floured work surface. Transfer dough to a large baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
  11. Pour the caramel into the center of the dough. Spread the caramel over the dough leaving a 2” border.
  12. Arrange apples over caramel. Sprinkle peanuts on top, if using.
  13. Fold the edges of the border up towards the center, to form a crust. Brush the edges with beaten egg.
  14. Bake crostata in the oven for one hour. When crostata is completely baked, remove from oven, cool on baking sheet for ten minutes, and then transfer to wire rack to finish cooling completely.

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