Jalapeno Cheddar Crackers

I have a weakness for Disney movies, and more specifically Disney Pixar movies. Yes, that is right, I am a 28-year-old woman who bawls her eyes out at the end of Toy Story 3. I’m not even ashamed. Mike is convinced that the people at Disney-Pixar are trying to make these movies sadder and sadder.

When Up came out on DVD, I watched it with my family. I remember shedding a few tears, nothing too crazy though. Last year, there was a Friday night that Mike was working late. I ate dinner alone then poured myself a rather large glass of wine for an after dinner (you know, because booze and kids movies go hand in hand).

Needless to say, one glass turned into two and a few tears transformed into a full on ugly cry, sob fest. Maybe it was the wine, maybe it was the fact that we had recently been married and the movie just affected me differently now, who knows.

But, much to my surprise, in the middle of my ugly cry, who should walk in the door? Mike!

He walked through the front door, took one look at me, and literally dropped everything in his hands to come over to me and see what was wrong. Little did I know, Mike did not even take into account that Up was on the TV. He thought somebody died. That is how bad this crying was.

He got so mad at me for voluntarily subjecting myself to a movie that affects me so adversely, that he told me not to watch it ever again. Ha! Okay Mike, whatever you say!

It is a cute movie. I asked Mike if he would watch it with me for Valentine’s Day. Yeah. Looking back now, I guess the beginning of the movie is a bit depressing for a Valentine’s Day viewing. Oh well.

Oh man, was I surprised to see the affect this movie had on Mike. I thought I was bad! He was lecturing me about how “emotionally taxing” the movie was in between tears. I think it is a touching movie about life and trying to get past hard moments. Mike just thinks of it as emotional warfare.

I watched it the other day on ABC Family. Once again, yes, I am 28 years old and I watch the 25 days of Christmas on ABC Family. Whatev.

As predicted, we both were wrecks. So the next day I decided to try and make it up to him with some homemade jalapeno cheddar crackers. He loves Cheez-It crackers so much, so this was the perfect apology for making him sit through this emotionally volatile movie, yet again.

So, if you need to apologize to somebody or are looking for a unique present this holiday season, these work like a charm!

Jalapeno Cheddar Crackers

Prep Time 35 minutes
Cook Time 15 minutes
Total Time 50 minutes
Author Sarcastic Cooking


  • 4 Tablespoons Unsalted Butter room temperature
  • 8 Ounces Cheddar Cheese finely grated
  • ½ Teaspoon Salt
  • ¼ Teaspoon Black Pepper
  • 3 Jalapenos seeded and roughly chopped
  • 1 Cup All-Purpose Flour
  • 1 Tablespoon Cold Water


  1. Add the roughly chopped jalapenos to a food processor and process on low until the jalapenos are finely minced.
  2. In the bowl of an electric stand mixer, fitted with the paddle attachment, cream together the butter, cheese, salt, pepper, and jalapenos.
  3. With the mixer on low, slowly add in the flour. When the flour is incorporated, add the tablespoon of cold water. Mix on medium/low speed until the dough is a soft ball.
  4. Divide the dough in half. Press each half into a flat disc. Wrap each half in plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 minutes to an hour.
  5. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.
  6. Roll each disc out on a well-floured surface until about 1/8 of an inch thick. Use a cookie cutter or shot glass to cut 1-inch circles out of the dough. Use a toothpick to pierce a hole in the center of each cracker. Place the crackers close together on large baking sheets lined with parchment paper. Bake for 12 – 15 minutes until golden around the edges.
  7. Crackers last 3 – 4 days at room temperature in an air-tight container.

Recipe adapted from Joy the Baker

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  • Tom @ Waegook Tom
    December 12, 2012 at 7:49 pm

    Hahaha I love this post! I can’t believe that the Disney Pixar movies affect you so much?! Although I must admit that A Bug’s Life is one of the few movies that can get a tear out of me…when Princess Atta tells Flik that he betrayed the colony, but he was ONLY TRYING TO HELP!

    I’ve yet to see Up, but am scared to watch it now.

    By the way, these crackers sound AMAZING. I’m a sucker for anything savoury, especially cheesy goodness and these…omg. I shall commission my brother to make me a few dozen batches when I return to the UK, as sadly I am devoid of an oven here in Korea.

    • Stefanie
      December 12, 2012 at 8:55 pm

      I know what can I say, I am a sucker for a good Disney movie. I hope your brother does indeed make you these!!!

  • Chris
    December 8, 2012 at 7:09 am

    A shame I’m out on cheddar and jalapenos. Thoise crackers look great!!!

  • Jennie @themessybakerblog
    December 7, 2012 at 1:03 pm

    Oh my, do these look delicious!

    Okay, I think I just met my soulmate 🙂 I’m am also a 28 year old Disney loving freak. I don’t have kids, so I’m waiting for my friends kids to reach the age where I can take them to a Disney movie without me going alone and looking like a child stalker. Too bad you live in Chicago, or we could go together.

  • Stephie @ Eat Your Heart Out
    December 6, 2012 at 7:38 pm


    I also love D-P movies. I couldn’t handle the first 10 minutes of that movie the first time I saw it (I can barely handle it now). I saw it in theatres and actually said aloud, “If this movie doesn’t get happier in two minutes I am walking out of this theatre, I hate you Pixar!” Oh man.

    Let’s watch Disney movies together, ‘k?

    • Stefanie
      December 6, 2012 at 8:00 pm

      Oh man. I do t think you wanna see me while watching this movie!

  • Kerry @ Snark & Pepper
    December 6, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    This story cracks me up! I love Up, but it doesn’t make me bawl like a baby (I’m a big jerk, that’s why). If I had a huge serving of wine, though… anything is possible 🙂

    I am completely obsessed with Cheez Its to the point I don’t buy them because I eat the entire box in like 5 minutes. I’ve said Cheez Its are the one food I could hands down win at a competitive eating contest.

    • Stefanie
      December 6, 2012 at 8:02 pm

      You and my husband both!!! He can eat a box of Cheeze It’s in one sitting too! His best man actually presented him a box of Cheeze It’s during his toast at our wedding just to make sure Mike didn’t give up all his bachelor foods!

  • Amber @ Slim Pickin's Kitchen
    December 6, 2012 at 6:57 pm

    OMG, you so sound like me! I am such a sap for anything and everything that can be considered emotionally taxing in any way. I cry during Hallmark commercials, Disney movies, TV shows…anything that is sad or happy…and I’m 20 + 11 yrs old, so there’s that too. Please don’t even get me started on the movie “August Rush”. Have you seen it? I die! My husband thinks it is hilarious b/c I will literally have tears *STREAMING* down my face within the first 3 minutes of watching it (no matter if we just happened to flip to it when it was 3/4 of the way over), and I will literally sob throughout the entire movie. It’s redonkulous. He’s learned over our 6 yrs together (1 yr married) not to jump to conclusions as to why I’m crying. He just automatically assumes it’s because I can’t find my favorite owl pajamas or that I saw a cute kitten on Instagram or something 😉

    • Stefanie
      December 6, 2012 at 8:04 pm

      I am so happy I am not the only emotional wreck out there! Why do we do this to ourselves? And August Rush… Oh man even my brother cries at that movie!